dunia ya wiki hii.

news and television can be fascinating.today i found out that a british woman voluntarily(VOUNTARILY!?) made a trip on her own(SOLO!?) to the north pole(or was it the south?)
AI?! sometimes i dont understand people; all that money, all that energy, the risk of death...how has that act benefited anyone, perhaps, apart from her record breaking self?what would you tell youre child if he/she came up to you to tell you...

'ma, i do d'clare that i'm going to the north pole t'day,uhuh! with a par a skis and some suppliz. we gotsta be fandin out what the ambience is lak aout therre!'
anyway, more on news-Saadam is being executed!im a bit torn. this seems like some dodgy business. that aside, i wonder whose trembling in their boots/ngomas/sandak at the thought of once tyrannical rulers becoming fallible.
-i found this cartoon funny;attach the name of whichever country you please

aaah!today is a good day!i made 12 chapos! and none was dodgy...i.e apart form the shape...aki God is good!its been a long road to this point!woo!im actually overwhelmed!you might be wondering why?im not interested very much in cakes and chocolate and all the other stuff that guys think chics like, my weakness is chapos!and since i was left to my own defenses, i realized that heh!i had to learn, where in theuk was i going to pata chapos of maana...whenever, where ever!...
aaah
now to make them round kabisa!

Life can be quite the adventure!

"Jean Jaque was dead.
my father tried to wipe the glee off his face..but unfortunately ended up looking intensely constipated. the wiry solicitor, believeing this to be a show of a manly grief handed my father the letter and hastily made his exit.
his curiosity tweaked, my father slowly lifted the flap....
it was a letter from Mr.J!

'my dear...ummm... servant,
I do conclude that if you are reading this ..then i must be dead.did my wife kill me?
anyway,in return for your years of service i bequith you my prized possessions.my life's joy. note that i speak in plural my dear boy.

yours

Jaque'

P/s they are enroute to yours by ship and should arrive in a few weeks.

fast forward. a few weeks later......
my fathers gaze fell upon three and a half insidious looking mammals. forever the optimist, he walked towards them, slowly crouching to look the sorriest one in the eye (the half goat) it was a deep, intense look.all of life and its mysteries seemed to be in that one look! this appraisal was interuupted though , by something flapping about to his left...a note!it was attached to one of the goats collars.
with shaking hands, my father unfurled the peice of smelly paper, his heart now moving from his boots to somewhere around his diaphragm...

'i present to you mandy, boo, jethro and o.b....
yours
Jaque'

a sob escaped my fathers lips. then a smirk. then a full bellied roar of a laugh. wiping tears from his eyes he walked slowly back into his domain, his small hut.
and it is with these three and a half very malnourished goats that my father made his millions making Goat cheese in the heart of southern nyanza."

ITS MERRY CHRISTMAS DAY!yep!
im throwing a bash! a huge one!but its card only!and all my imaginary friends had the grace to come...sniff..and each of them with a present and a big hug!awww, the beauty of friendship...
anyway, their appearance inspired me to write something. hence my first short story of no maana. hope you all have a blessed day, God be with you!

it said...

......i was left all alone
'my heart was breaking'
thought was on my own
'soul was aching'
tears covered me
'weeping through the whole night'
and i need some relief
'joy comes in the morning'
i've been searching for
'many years now'
the keys to life's door
'i need to know how'
brought to my knees
'saviour can you help me'
and was led to believe
'a failure i was to be'

His love showed me love said not so
even with the odds against me
love showed me love said not so
keep on holding on
love showed me love said not so.....

Bebe and Cece Winans-Love said not so

Genius!

do we need the money!?

oowi!
i read this article, but its not what it said that made me go oowi!but the comments it generated.so,do super powers and their ilk really have any obligation to us? i know there are sijui how many arguments, be it from slave trade to arms trade and to them being the prime suspects in causing the climatic changes that are upon us!
talk about weather thats beginning to PMS.
however...(said like the primo GHC teacher) we are as much to blame, dont you think? especially if we want to boast about how africans are not stupid! infact ebu i mis-apply a metaphor....it takes two to tango! or three or four or whatever....talk about an interesting tango!but politics on the macro scale attests to the complexity of that tango! haya, i was going off on a tangent.anywho, these comments are the ones that made me want to say...'wacha!'

comment 1!
(this chic i believe must be smoking terere or something!ati arm the women!)
'One thing has become very clear ... the money must go the women who use it constructively and do not squander it as we know the men have done. To rebuild communities the women need to be well armed, and militia trained in order to ward off the destructive men. They will only be rid of these dreadfully destructive wars when they finally get rid of patriarchy, it's killing them all with its greed, its 'need' for instant gratification, and its violence.
Arm the women not just with pots and pans, but with guns and strategies for any defence they may need to maintain their authority. With these determined women in charge all the communities will begin the thrive. ...'


ya pili!
'"As usual, Africans are dying because the greedy bastards in The City or Wall Street or Paris won't think twice about funding private armies to grab African resources."
Africans are dying because other Africans make a conscious choice to do so. I feel no guilt about Africa, and feel no compunction to give my hard earned money to African charity. the only soution to the problems of Africa are for the Africans to work out their own solutions. We cannot solve them with charity, or armed intervention. '

ya tatu!-i chekad
'One of the most effective immediate ways of controlling the killing and hideous forms of rape (vs. date rape) in Darfur, would be for whites to take their tents and set up camp there. ...'

ya nne"-ati erase tribal lines!yep just like that!
'I have to laugh on several articles here you guysare flogging the US/UK for being involved in Iraq then call for US/UK intervention here. Personnally I say let us erase all these false borders that were drawn up during the colonial times and let the local folks decide what state/tribe they live in. In the past tribal affiliations had no bearing as to how the lines were drawn and now you have tribal warfare rading across all these so called borders. I don't think this would stop the fighting it would just make it easier for all involved to identify who is fighting who and which tribe to support or not support.'

wattagwan!

there be plenty a jamaicans in d area dat im livin in nah!it makin me feel like i be part a dem.but d fact dat i gat no dread and me talk african nah...it disqualify me plenty!
anyway, moving on swiftly to some random things ive been thinking about...
-theres a mini territorial war going on in my digz. mostly sprouting from the fact that from misunderstanding stems miscommunication, stems misappropriation and other sillinesses. ai!one of my roomates just fills me with amazement, sometimes this amazement makes me feel like throwing something out the window, but its amazement nonetheless.some of these things, in the vast scheme of life ,would seem very petty. but i tell you,when you find youre mkate always being stuffed into mouldy cupboards or dusty joints in the kitchen...among other things!heh!you do wonder. ive caught dysentry once! i dont need to be catching random mutations of britto diseases! we've already had one meeting!i dont like confrontation...sigh. and the thing is she is a nice person.
-i was being told there was a tornado in london...what would i do if a tornado fikad here considering im like 2hours away from london!aki you should me chuking mortal kombat moves with my faithful umbrella every time upepo blasts me.
-now how often should miro hair be washed?pong notwithstanding.
-Moab! in the book of Jeremiah (around ch.48)God punishes these peeps because of their haughtiness, their pride, because of their trust, not in him, but in their deeds and riches.they have a good thing going but alas, they mess it up!and i cant say why, but this made me want to pray forKenya. i thought about the so called 'african pride' and realized that is has facets of good and evil. majorty have discarded the good.i thought about yuppiedom and the way in which it embraces artifice.i thought about the materialism thats overtaking much of kenya. When kids are taught directly and indirectly that success is defined by what they have which seems rational considering the prevailing socio-political-economic climate. but how many people teach their kids, neices,nephews how to love, give, serve or do it themselves?its not that much of a wonder then why many africans are still stuck in a never-ending rut!
then i thought about the way things can get thick!!!and im sure youve heard this cliche lakini be sure of it that moab wasnt the first and its not gonna be the last!
and i part with thesewords....it only be God who can be helpin us nah!cha!(sound effects) we all neeed t' be gettin our focus right and nat be messing about wit d wrong tings man!money aint gona get ya noo-where!and neither are dese wordly tings nah!bless!one luv!
-

wakarao gani hawa?!

now!
you!
yes you!
how are you?
ive never asked that question on a blog before...but it is good to ask dont you think?
anyway!i really wanted to write a shairi about what im about to describe, but clearly acing my KCPE swa exams ...eh did not equip me for such a task!which is sad, because after all those beatings...sniff!we were really beaten! the implement of choice was a rod called something black. i was lucky to have escaped it only to be handwad by the math TA and a black board ruler that had no name!
however, the pont is after those beatings,i should be rendering sweet shairis with the best of them. but alas!
moving on swiflty, i was walking towards the bus stop. it had been a long day and the whole concept of days becoming shorter and colder and darker earlier...had wearied my soul.
so there i am walking, walking, daydreaming, walking, and then i look up and lo!ehe!this was a ghafula bin vu moment (for those of you who aced swa like me)
i had found myself in a mini-cop scene!wow!how exciting!
please note:if i was back home i would have kept myself at a safe distance where i could either run or jump into a jav or shop or something ,if anything were to go wrong. but i just kept walking! the whole idea of drama i believe, tugs at some primitve thing in every kenyans heart.
but im not reckless.i knew i was more or less safe cause there were just 3 cops. and here the way ive seen it, theres some sort of hierarchy of alarm when dealing with cops.

• theres the cops who walk around, usually with a walki talki, bright reflector vests and maybe a flashlight...or 2. havent seen any of them with rungus though. these are the regulars. i generally feel nothing for these ones.
• then theres the cops on the piki-pikis, i hardly see them but if i did, i would probabaly be a bit more careful!
• and then therees the big guns!the ones with the cars. there the ones who piga kelele all over the city zooming from one neighbourood to the other.aki someitmes i wonder if they really do jobo.lakini considering the way gangs can be silly here...

so i get to the bus stop and my interst is piqued. these 3 cops are talking to a man on the ground who is calmly eating a sandwich and this man is generally paying them no heed.he's friend however,is busy verbally decorating the atmosphere with various expletives directed at the cop(s). now i try and get close enough to hear whats going on. but i cant hear!
aaah!
and another problem with the folk here is that people think themselves too polite to be curious! the joy of being kenyan is that youll always get the storo!or some version of it!
this didnt look like it was about to happen.
so the whole vibe ended there. bila flair!i was quite dissapointed!they just picked up the guy, who was still eating his sandwich and whisked him away.
imagine how entertaining(human rights issues aside) 3 kenyan cops/watchmen would have been!
sigh.at that moment the entire population of the city i lived in seemed irredeemably dull!